Trauma is in the eye of the beholder. If something impacts a person in a significant way that elicits a traumatic response, then that is trauma. Oftentimes a more specific label of what defines trauma is sought out to exclude ourselves from being “like that.” In reality, the majority of people in the world will experience some type of trauma in their life. The reactions to trauma is what varies drastically between individuals.

Two children can be brought up in the exact same environment and one can grow into a successful professional, while the other ends up chemically dependent and homeless. Researchers continue to seek answers to the variations of this. Personally, I choose to allow trauma in my life to impact only in positive ways. That sounds simple, “I choose,” but really to make the change of how one’s trauma will impact them takes a great deal of work and self-care.

Solution Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT) seems to be a misunderstood modality by those who do not practice it regularly. I can attest it is a difficult but rewarding way to focus on finding solutions rather than drudging up underlying emotions. There are times when processing a trauma can definitely benefit an individual as done in the more well known Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). However, I firmly believe that if it is not in a person’s best interest to re-live and review a trauma, then don’t! Several clients have given feedback that they prefer my therapy because I do not make them talk about things they do not want to discuss.

That’s not to say there is not the confrontation in SFBT that there is in CBT. It just manifests in a completely different way. Basically, it is the client’s job to use their cognitive abilities both in and out of sessions to grow the intrinsic motivation that exists. I say it exists because by coming to the office and sitting in front of a counselor, a person has already shown they have it inside themselves to make change happen.