Everyone knows the feeling of anger and how it can vary in degrees. The 3 easiest emotions people seem to recognize are happiness, anger, and sadness. We each have different warning signs and triggers for anger. However, the physiological response is the same in all our bodies.

Warning signs of anger are important to recognize so that we know when coping skills are require, especially if in an environment where immediately expressing the anger is inappropriate. Signs of our bodies getting angry include, but are not limited to getting warm, face being flush, palms getting sweaty, shaking, clinching fists, and heavy breathing.

Triggers to anger can include a myriad of things. Common triggers include being yelled at, being cut off in traffic, being hit or punched, and begin verbally attacked even if not being yelled at. Other triggers may include rudeness, loud noises, Facebook arguments, not being listened to, being told no, and not getting our way. There are of course, many more triggers not listed here because we all have unique experiences of the world. What may anger one person, another might brush off as no big deal.

When angered, the body releases stress hormones, activating the autonomic nervous system. This system consists of two subsystems: the sympathetic and parasympathetic. The former is commonly called the fight or flight response and can feel like it happens in the blink of an eye. The parasympathetic is active when we begin calming down and it is a much slower process. As I mentioned before, it is not always a good time to let the anger out in the moment. This is where coping skills come in.

Both internal and external coping skills are effective in regulating intense anger. I recommend developing internal coping skills, which can be done within your body because we cannot guarantee external things to be available. The most effective and commonly hear of is deep breathing. You might be thinking, “Ugh, that doesn’t work for me.” To that I say, no, you just haven’t found the breathing technique that works for you. Below are a few breathing techniques, but these are not all of them and you can even create your own!

• Bowl of soup -take a deep breath in and blow out as long and slow as possible like when you cool off soup.
• Count inhale 5 seconds, exhale 5 seconds.
• Deep breath in, hold 2-3 seconds, and slowly release.
• Put one hand on the stomach, one on the head, and focus on the stomach expanding on inhale and getting smaller on exhale.

Remember though, it can be good to calm ourselves in the moment, but it is equally important to express the anger later when it is safe. Otherwise it gets bottled up and can result in an anger outburst or explosion. Comment below with how you express your anger.